You’re not an idiot and you don’t have to go through this alone. Believe me, I’ve seen this story play out a thousand times. I wish I could tell you it always ends well, but the truth is that it doesn’t. Almost always, the reason things don’t work out is because people don’t do anything to create change – they let their feelings of being trapped and helplessness overcome them. Don’t let that be you!!
What I CAN tell you is that it sounds like you really need to find some support. I know its hard to believe when you’re living through this nightmare, but your situation really isn’t unique, and I personally know people who have been EXACTLY where you are and felt all the same emotions you are feeling now, and are now living happy, fulfilling lives in healthy, mutually loving relationships. It’s certainly not easy, it takes time, a lot of pain, and sometimes it takes making some really hard choices – but the common denominator is that they reached out for help.
wow this sounds like the story of my life, i too feel hopeless and he blames me for his problem even though he had this problem before we met. unfortunately at the moment im in the hospital on strict bed rest, 28 weeks pregnant i had a surgery 3 weeks ago (basically sewed me shut) but can deliver anytime, im 22 years old and this is our first child. we are having many complications which is making his drinking worst.i have no friends of my own and i feel scared and alone for me and our unborn child. as im typing he’s extremely drunk and gets violent, destroys our home. hes never laid a hand on me fortunately. i just feel like i cant do it anymore and trying to reach out to other women like me. email me anytime [email protected] id love to talk to you, cause i just sit in this room all day hah
Do not blame yourself, no matter what he says and how much he pretends to be in love with u and promises to change his addiction for u
Diane, I never sign up to leave comments on a page, but your story just spoke to me and moved me so much because I am in the exact same situation. I, too, am a young adult and a newlywed. I, too, knew of my husband’s alcoholism before our afraid to leave. I, too, feel like an idiot for choosing this life when I could have such a better one. I love my husband when he is sober which is why I don’t want to leave. I am no longer myself but I’m slowly turning into a person that even I despise. Thank you for telling your story. Thank you for reaching out. You have given me such a gift, and I feel like you’re a kindred spirit. I will not stop praying that you may find your happiness.
Please love yourself, try to engage in something more important than him, stay calm and if u want to marry another man and do not expect the new man to be any better because he might come with some other baggage
Take control of your life. If you do not have kids yet, move out of marriage ASAP. If you have children, make sure they are not in the fighting scenes, send them to boarding etc. Happiness is within u and not in someone else personality, genes, behaviour and habits, so better look within u and eharmony sign in explore your own potentials